What inspired me to write this article was this video – it’s sad and hilarious at the same time. It’s a call for women to bridge the gap and teach our wonderful men about our pleasure, cycles, and bodies, so he doesn’t think a Vulva is something he “drives” – it will make sense when you watch the video.

Ah, the clitoris – the mystical button that has bewildered many lovers for centuries. It’s like the holy grail of pleasure, hidden in plain sight yet oh-so-elusive. We’re about to go on a pleasure knowledge journey through the land of the clitoris.

The clitoris is a secret garden nestled between the folds of the labia. It’s packed with thousands of nerve endings, (Around 8,000) making it the ultimate pleasure powerhouse.

Pleasuring The Clitoris-ConfidentLovers.com

But it’s not just what you can see on the outside, there is entire internal structure that can only be seen through MRI scans. Here is a great article for all you Scientific Minds out there. 

Here is what a full clitoris looks like.

Pleasuring A Clitoris-ConfidentLovers.com

So how do we navigate this pleasure paradise without getting lost?

Pleasuring The Clitoris

Step one: Approach with reverence and curiosity. Understand her pleasure preferences. Too much pressure too quickly and she goes into hiding for self -protection.


• Subtle buildup

• Sensual teasing

• Smooth movements

• Exploration of surrounding areas

• Gradual application of pressure


• Rushing

• Friction

• Forcefulness

• Rough handling

• Excessive intensity

Step two: Embrace creativity. For many women, direct stimulation of the clitoris isn’t the primary path to pleasure – at times direct touch can feel painful.

Touch the surrounding areas instead. For example, if the clitoris is at 12’o clock then 11 or 1’o clock might be here sweet spot or lower.

Pleasuring The Clitoris-ConfidentLovers.com

Technique #1: Tease Her To Bliss

Put the outer lips between your thumb and index finger, then squeeze and let go and do it multiple times. Another variation is to move up and down.

Pleasuring The Clitoris -ConfidentLovers.com

 Common pleasure techniques include:

  • Up-down
  • Circular
  • Side-to-side
  • Or blend of all

Take your finger (s) on a tour to see which area responds to your touch.

Technique #2 – Stimulating The Shaft

The shaft is the foreskin covering the clitoris. For some women this feels great, for others there is no sensation there.

Pleasuring The Clitoris -ConfidentLovers.com
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Technique #3 – Double Stimulation

When she’s highly aroused, have her lie on her stomach, stimulate her g-spot or vaginal canal with your index and middle finger and use your other hand to stimulate her clitoris.

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Step three: Communication is key. The clitoris is like a wise sage – it knows it’s desires, but it can’t speak for itself. So, listen to your partner’s cues and feedback. If something feels good, keep doing it. If not, try something new. And don’t be afraid to ask for directions – a little guidance can go a long way in the pursuit of pleasure.

Best Positions

Her On Top – Increase her pleasure by tilting your pelvis up, giving her perfect access to rub her clitoris against your pelvic bone.

Pleasuring the Clitoris

Missionary – Her legs are half way up, with her hips tilted up towards your pelvis. This position makes it easier for you to rub her clitoris with your pelvic bone while you are thrusting in and out.

How To Stimulate The Clit-Confidentlovers.com

The clitoris is like a treasure map to ecstasy, waiting to be explored and savored. The best aphrodisiac is laughter – don’t forget to have fun along the way.

Want To Learn More Ways to Stimulate Her Vulva & Vagina? Then Check Out Our Erotic Touch Course