The word ‘tantra’ today has many meanings, the most significant definition still remains – a path to expand consciousness.
The Sanskrit root ‘tan’ means ‘to expand’. The philosophical and practical system of tantra can be summed up as ‘nothing exists that isn’t divine’.
This is the quintessence of tantric philosophy.” Tantra is neither a path of suppression nor indulgence.
It’s a path of reclaiming our power to experience love, joy and bliss in all parts of our lives.
It promotes living with mindfulness, awareness, and growing into a higher states of consciousness.
There are many different tantric paths one can choose, each provides value for understanding ourselves, others, and the world we live in.
One aspect of Tantra is that it can open you up to mind-blowing intimate, sexual and sensual experiences with yourself and your lover.
What Turns Sex Into Tantric Sex?
When we practice the ‘normal’ bedroom routine, it satisfies our basic physical needs and urges.
The general norm is to rub, touch and then go for the grand finale, which is all good and fine, but tantric sex goes beyond that.
Tantric sex is having sex with awareness, which makes it a highly potent aphrodisiac. It’s a dance between you and your lover. There is no goal to orgasm and it doesn’t always involve intercourse.
Ultimately, it’s all about appreciating and connecting with the other person and creating a tighter bond.
Here are three simple Tantric Sex-ercises to help revolutionise your sex life:
1. Make Eye Contact
This might take some time getting used to.
Initially, it can feel a bit silly and uncomfortable; it may even bring up bursts of giggles or tears, but once you overcome awkwardness it’s one of the easiest ways to step up the sexual ante.
Start by sitting face to face (ideally on the bed) and look into each other’s left eye, soften your gaze and sit there for a few minutes and see what feelings and emotions come up.
It’s a great practice to help deepen the love, eliminate shame and open up the heart which will help both of you feel seen and felt by one another.
A slow sensory massage is another powerful way of exploring sensuality. It can also be the key to multiple orgasms.
Here’s how you do it: Decide who gets to be the ‘giver’, and who’s the ‘receiver’. The receiver gets to lay back and surrender, getting the chance to fully tune in to their own pleasure.
While the giver moves their hands slowly and meditatively along the receivers body using different types of strokes, whilst playing with the intensity and the rhythm of the massage.
Another important part is to stimulate undiscovered erogenous zones.
After massaging the whole body, start by stimulating erogenous zones that you don’t normally consider erotic.
Some of these areas include:
- Back of the knees
- Inner thighs
- Elbow crooks
And wherever your hands take you.
Once the receiver responds with moans of pleasure then gently and gradually increase the intensity through ebb and flow.
3. Sit On Your Partner’s Lap
One of the most famous tantric sex positions is called ‘Yab-Yum.’ It’s a symbol of the union between Shiva and Shakti – the masculine & feminine forces.
It can be done between any gender, but traditionally, the male sits with his legs crossed while the female partner sits in his lap, wrapping her legs around him.
Once you come into alignment, start by taking a few deep slow synchronised breaths together.
Then begin to move together in slow undulations, arching, swirling in circles, finding a rhythm that feels delicious and arousing, activating your sexual energy together.
It’s all about the breath here. As you connect with each other’s breath you can expand into higher states of pleasure.
The way to do this is: draw orgasmic energy by deep breathing from your pelvis up the spine and to the head – contract your pelvic muscle and feel the energy rise.
This position can be practised fully clothed, naked or during penetration if you prefer.
You can also experience full-body energy orgasms without penetration and fully clothed – incredible, right?
This definitely takes some practice though.
Top Tantric Tip For Women
Slow your breathing down as you approach orgasm.
Most women breathe more quickly as we feel ourselves peaking and we tense up trying to bring the orgasm on.
Instead, relax your stomach, and take slow deep breaths into your tummy. The orgasm will last longer and be more intense.
If you’re looking for other ways to explore your sexuality, then take this erotic blue print quiz to help you identify your pathways to pleasure.
Tantra is not a religion; there is no dogma, no institution. It is a practice; a way of being.